Tip: let a member of the opposite sex help you fill out your online dating service profile.

Based on a true story (for real):

“It wants a profile picture.”

“Use the same one as your Facebook profile, as you look cool with the camera in your hand and the way it covers half your face makes you look mysterious.”

“Really?”

“Hell yeah!”

“What should I put in the ‘I’m really good at’ section?”

“Put the video of you juggling in different places around the world. Girls will love that!”

“Really? I thought it was a bit nerdy.”

“You have no idea, do you?”

“Hmmm, okay. Six things I can’t live without? Well, my laptop, obviously…”

“Don’t say your laptop!”

“Why not? It’s the most expensive thing I’ve ever bought, and without it I wouldn’t be filling out this stupid OkCupid profile… How about ‘I can’t live without hugs’?”

“Perfect.”

“I was joking.”

“Hugs is cute.”

“You should message me if… You want an interesting adventure.”

“I’d message you.”

“The truth is I’m looking for sex.”

“If the girl is also looking for sex, she’ll interpret that as interesting and adventurous sex.”